Omigod! This does 'slain a lot! Who knew? I am still learning about being honest with myself and Recliner-chair Guy after 46 yrs.--I'm from a time just before female sexual liberation. The rules of the game in Japan sound awful to me; I want to run or chew nails or grab my guy and rip his clothes off and have hot monkey sex in the front entry way--with the door open!. (Conveniently, he's not home and he'll come in via the garage. Nowhere near the front entry way!) I understand the safety and comfort of living within one's own cultural imperatives, but sometimes it's good to cross-over a bit. It's how we grow. Not this, though. Nuh-uh. In my family, and that of Recliner-chair Guy, too, we learned to never say what is needed. Instead, one had to intuit everything, which almost always leads to misunderstanding, which proved that there was not-love. It's been the work of a lifetime to learn differently and even now, when we go to our elderly parents, we have to consciously remember that they 'do it differently', which is so frustrating 'cause we still get it 'wrong'--we still can't intuit correctly. A burden, for schizzle! Thx for this article. Makes the restraint of Zack-Aerith courtship understandable--he's Western, she Japanese? Cloud-Tifa--I keep urging them on...sometimes they listen and sometimes they still hang back long after I'm on the floor with frustration. mc
My family's big on the intuit bit as well. We're... okay. Mostly from habit and repetition and as long as nothing changes in any given standard situation. It does cause misunderstandings though and the fact that the other person is supposed to realize there's a misunderstanding and doesn't... things snowball from time to time.
I never have this problem with my hamsters however which must be why we get along so well. When they want out of the cage they chew on the bars and when they want back in, they try to climb up my leg or the side of the bed. When I tap my fingers on the tile, they know to come running for a pick up. If I only had to intuit hamsters I'd be fine. People are a bit more confusing.
the same place that pointed me to this article also had stats that showed that Japan has one of the lowest satisfaction rates in the world when it came to sex as well.
wonder why...
LOL!! Your poor, poor bunnies. Still they both seem enthusiastic enough that it probably wouldn't stay 'proper' for long.
Seriously? The flirting, I get, but the sex...? Weird... Not that I would know, of course. And not that I'm one to judge other cultures. Just goes to show how different people are. But, whatever floats your boat, I guess.
Kinda funny, though ;p Still, might wanna be careful about asking people to take a shower in Japan.
-SF (who is, once again, too lazy to log in; but too o.O by this post not to comment)
bwahaha!! I can just imagine a friend coming over after a game of sports or hiking or something and being innocently offered use of the shower. Ah the fun of culture misunderstandings! And yeah, we all do things differently but I can't imagine it would be a lot of fun to just lie there. Heck, I have a hard enough time just lying there at the doctor's office and inevitably start to talk so at least I'm doing -something-. It would make sex interesting on a weird level - lol
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2011-03-10 09:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-18 05:57 am (UTC)I never have this problem with my hamsters however which must be why we get along so well. When they want out of the cage they chew on the bars and when they want back in, they try to climb up my leg or the side of the bed. When I tap my fingers on the tile, they know to come running for a pick up. If I only had to intuit hamsters I'd be fine. People are a bit more confusing.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-11 07:10 am (UTC)O.O
No wonder the Japanese birth rate is dropping!
Aaaaand now I'm HIGHLY tempted to work some of this info into a sex scene....
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Date: 2011-03-18 05:54 am (UTC)wonder why...
LOL!! Your poor, poor bunnies. Still they both seem enthusiastic enough that it probably wouldn't stay 'proper' for long.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-11 02:49 pm (UTC)Seriously? The flirting, I get, but the sex...? Weird... Not that I would know, of course. And not that I'm one to judge other cultures. Just goes to show how different people are. But, whatever floats your boat, I guess.
Kinda funny, though ;p Still, might wanna be careful about asking people to take a shower in Japan.
-SF (who is, once again, too lazy to log in; but too o.O by this post not to comment)
no subject
Date: 2011-03-18 05:52 am (UTC)